IVF - Stimulation Phase Day 9

The cycle was not cancelled on Wednesday so I was quite relieved! However, I was asked to return today to have the follicle presence and maturation evaluated again. On the 20th they requested I add the medication Menopur to the regimen in order to further assist stimulation, as well as aide maturation of the follicles. This medication is a bit cumbersome to use, as you have to mix it and do a few steps of transferring it from it's glass container into a syringe, etc. When administering Menopur, I've found I've had to slowly inject the substance, in comparison the the injection rate I use with Gonal F. Menopur seems to have a bit of a burn to it! Both go in the tummy region, so as expected I have a 'pin cushion look' going on there.

I sat in the waiting room quite anxious this morning, ruminating ("will I have more follicles"; "are they growing?") Those same thoughts just churning and churning in my head. When they called my name for blood work I felt some relief that it was finally my turn. I was very disappointed in the lab tech I had this morning. Her level of insensitivity was astounding. She told me she was sorry to hear that my IVF cycle may be cancelled due to my poor response. I thanked her for her concern. However, surprisingly she followed by stating that she has no children and thinks it is the most wonderful way to live, "I actually get a chance to live my own life and it's wonderful!!" She told me she could not understand at all why women are so desperate to have a baby and "drive themselves crazy with this." She implied that perhaps I should take my poor response to the medication as a "good sign" /a blessing and perhaps I should go and enjoy my life without children.

I gave a minimal response to her, as she was not my concern this morning. All I had on my mind were my follicles ("how are my pre-babies?!") I attributed her non-empathic ramblings to an emotionally immature woman, who clearly had not developed within the areas of moral reasoning/character. Thankfully, she made the decision not to have children, thereby not damaging the next generation. I and perhaps the rest of society are grateful! It's almost comical that she would have such poor insight to think she were an appropriate fit for a position within a fertility practice.

Anyway, I eagerly awaited the u/s nurse and sadly the results were exactly the same as Wednesday. Three very small follicles - no growth/change. Again, I am awaiting an afternoon phone call to inform me of my E2 level. If it is good we continue; if low the cycle is canceled.

IVF is such a roller coaster ride. I'll push back my tears for now and see what news the afternoon brings.
xoxox